I am not a fan of change, not because I don’t enjoy new things but because I would like to avoid experiencing anxiety at all costs. Unfortunately, this means I can miss out on great things in life out of fear, or that I stay in places that are not optimal for my growth, happiness, and health.
I spend a lot of time thinking about the topic of change and shifting perspectives but struggled to simply put words to it.
It is not easy trying to create a change about the fear of change.
When we are stuck in fear and anxiety our brain does not function at its highest level; we avoid, isolate, stay quiet, and sometimes even feel ashamed of this battle. Functioning in this place we lose our ability to have a flexible perspective about life and the options available to us.
This became clear to me in the most subtle way one day at a Ralphs store.
I have what I call a home store, the store that’s close to me and I know where I can find everything I need in the shortest amount of time.
But one day I had to go to a different store to buy my favorite ice cream.
This meant, I had to walk through every single aisle, trough every single fridge, paying attention to what I was seeing. As I was browsing I came across these puff pastries that are now one of my most favorite sweet treats. As funny as it may sound, I think to myself how sad it would be if I went through life without experiencing these amazing pastries.
Even funnier is that, this is all for puff pastries. Can you imagine the grief and sadness that I would have to live with if I found out what amazing experiences and opportunities I missed out on because I was not willing to walk through the aisles of life???
I have realized that FEAR OF REGRET is way worse than the fear of change.
So im staring to create change in the smallest ways to help reduce my anxiety and teach my fearful nervous system that just because it feels like its going to kill me, it does not mean that it will. I know this is a slow learning process because my body and my brain are trying to protect me, but in the most maladaptive way. Who knows when and where this fear got ingrained in me; but what I do know is that the brain is flexible and can learn to change.
So here is my suggestion: go to a different store and pay attention to what you have not seen because you were stuck in a safe routine.